Reflection

What can I conclude at the end of my Peace Corps service?

Well I’ll attach my official description of service soon, but until then, let me say a few things in response to
“how was it?”

For the surest answer, read earlier entries in this blog. But of course all experiences are changed by analysis’s hindsight. As for my thoughts now, they are poorly seasoned and relatively bland.

I would do it all over again, of course very differently. I’ve learned more about myself then anyone learned about English, me or America.

I made positive changes, after I was relatively fluent in Ukrainian and only where I had strong and close community support. I only wish that language was the largest obstacle.

I have many new friends.

This reflection is still premature.
It needs more seasoning.

Time and Opportunity

Algerian font matches

out of proportion feelings

time running out

running running out

Violined OUt

calm inner self

transition

opportunity time

Breath

Make lists

accomplish tasks

all will be done in thy

time is plenty

but still

it’s gotta all come out

Rant

old clothes ragtime

new clothes giveaway

few clothes bringaway

red clothes run

Campstove sell

sleeping bag roll

music stand donate

notebook gift

trophy soccer jersey

duct tape

books

But all that doesn’t even compare to the time and energy I need to say goodbye

not for a time

a few months

see u on facebook

but years, maybe forever, and you don’t even have email

I doubt you can afford to pay international postage

Fortitude seems unfair

I was accepted, trusted and part of their town

now I just go?

"all my hopes for you to settle down here for good

bring your parents too!

it’s just as I suspected

Despite all his words

America must be nicer

look at him an all his opportunities

he’ll make a decent living with half the sweat I do

24 and he can still mess around as if he were 17

hasn’t even started his career yet"

And then there’s the newlyweds on the bus

Ivan says he had a great English teacher in his village school

She’s dead now, Гірник graveyard

Ivan has worked 500meters underground

four years down

twenty one to go

mine #9

electrical engineer

$300/month

coal

three months married

Natalia wants to get pregnant

he says she just doesn’t understand

the financial pressure

of having a kid

they’ve been talking about that new factory for six years

I have no choice

the mine or drugs

a hard life or no life

I can’t believe you are here

I don’t care about the election

Проти Всі!

Take my number

call me

you are a good person

May God Give You Happiness

Goodbye

That sure puts my silliness in perspective

How lucky I am

Life is just shining down on me

a gift of time and opportunities

thank you

but why me?

October 7th

‘If only’s never get you anywhere

but…

no, I won’t dwell

stinky excuses

soccer is frustrating

because I don’t practice

because my Achilles is not healthy

because I haven’t taken 3 months off to cross train

because I don’t have access to cross-training facilities

one more game

wow, how stinky these excuses are

after all, what equipment do I need to do yoga?

short-timers disease

the beginning of

the new

failure to make due

looking farther than

my horizons

2 months to a swimming pool

Cleanup project this weekend a great success!

70 kids, teachers, and politicians

2 tons of trash

350kg of glass bottles

6 anti-littering signs

but most importantly

I did much less work than last time

which means

the kids are getting it

how to organize

delegate and support each other

empowerment through youth led development

small project design and management

next up

getting the movie theatre up and running

through some sort of club

keep going

I’m good at pushing through

but it’s going to be a shock

when one day

baby roots ripped up

put back in the 2003 hole

grow now?

too many leaves

pages of experiences

torn tubers

can I make the project design and management club

self-sustaining?

if not, what was the point?

people still litter

cut down trees

forget how HIV transmits

or neglect to inform their teenagers how to use a condom

Ha!

that old dream

immortality

as if one person could change the world

but oh they can

but not without proper commitment and preparation

both of which I will

in the end

fail to demonstrate here

back to school I go

for preparation

and commitment

will make a home

without the escape backdoor

back to where?

“wont you go back”

they’ll ask

back to my white skinned American male advantaged

rung on the opportunity ladder

No man

“I wont go”

because I don’t want to

I can’t

I’ve witnessed too much

and I refuse to take my wrongful place

in the unjust system

on a rotten ladder

to that false red “developed” fruit

progress and better quality of life

Open your eyes

I try

so many truths competing

left center right

economics a force for good?

the power of greed harnessed?

at least the system acknowledges selfishness

but why are environmentalists so single minded?

I hate the leftist exaggerations

that corporations are evil, as if they are giant monsters

and not merely the combined greed of thousands

no, combined good intention, to work and provide for her family

normal and natural on an individual basis

but when combined, capable of truly externalizing the social costs of exploitation

the investment in guns, oil, gold and metals

so distant from the people who have a stock

willing or not

Can’t you see that the richest countries are also the cleanest?

It is only when people have basic comforts

then they worry about picking up trash

what do you care

at your computer

Minimizing pollution

being less bad

than that guy in the hummer

what have you done today to eliminate poverty?

get on the phone already

with your senator congressmen state politician folks

but better yet

I don’t know

take a sign and stand by the road on your lunch break?

organize a flash mob outside REI?

too much intention

not enough action

Your country is doing things

do you know what they are?

what are my brothers doing in Afghanistan?

why can’t they be planting trees, building schools and teaching kids English slang?

why are they crawling through caves and hunting men?

Autumn Leaves Falling on Winter Hopes of Spring

two years and no trust in student centered learning

no chance to take a class through the joys of communicating with a foreign language

two years and trusted only to play with them

"We're giving you younger students this semester because we feel that you don't focus on grammar enough to prepare our students for their standardized tests"

Ok, well if you don't feel that using language is at all useful for grammar, then fine, just do drills and fill in the blank exercises all day.

It's ok, still get to see some of my favorite 8th, 9th, and 10th class, even if it is done on the dl

Good thing teaching English is only one third of my work right now. The other thirds are with my Ecology club, which has become a Project Design and Management club, and with my Healthy Lifestyles club, which is focusing on abstinence from drugs and sex now.

My mind is spending more and more time on the other side of the Atlantic

dreaming of being back in an academic setting

getting some more skills so that the next time I have a wonderful opportunity to live and work as a agent for change

I have a blog?

News?

School started Sept 1st.

Closing one grant

seeing if there is any way I can get some funding to get computers and internet in the town library

doing one more cleanup

possibly starting a recycling pickup point

yeah, nice and busy

playing soccer after missing every game this summer by being at 4 different summer camps on the 4 sides of Ukraine

spent more time in my tent than I did in any bed

mornings are already getting cooler and darker

then the time change hits which makes it dark by the time I get home from school

yeah, time to move south

Crazy summer

camps coming out my ears

ears of corn

pears smashing themselves

sweetness juicy

bees love pear juice

too many 

  plums to eat

  apples to dry

  peppers to pickle

  tomatoes to trickle

  potatoes to dig, sort, dry, store, clean, peel, and eat

homemade 

  ketchup

  salsa

  condensed milk

  tomato sauce

  corn cakes

Harvest Time

Elo visits to climb highest mountain

cell phone works only for me

bucket showers in the pig house

Grad School application time

MPH in global health or rural medicine

eventually leading to MD?

First want to work with more projects like the ones I've done here

except to be actually qualified and know in advance how to facilitate successful community health projects

then perhaps I'll continue my education expanding from the preventative side to the diagnostic+treatment side

Lots to think about and learn and do.

On the train

All the way across the country in any direction takes more than 24 hours.

Have a nice layover in Kyiv, finally got into the WWII museum.

Finished with Survivor Camp in the Carpathians, fun to teach first aid and live in a tent, poop in a hole, wash in the river, with sand

 

now off to an ecology camp

wishing i had a bit more time at home now that i know theoretically how to get my town recycling plastic and paper

there's a company in Lviv that will send a truck out to pick up materials and pay by the kilogram

but I won't be in town long enough to get this project off the ground until late August

 

reading harry potter in ukrainian

still

each page takes a long time

although it is all understandable

words are still read at the letter level

not the whole word recognition thing

 

ok, I bet that rice is done

cooking in the pc office is fun

and saves a whole lot of money

because kyiv prices are like nyc prices

 

amazing news from home

congratulations all of you

 

 

Chasing the ball

There's so much I've failed to report in this blog. Living life and not writing about it. But here goes a quick sum up since the last report on the break I took to climb Mt. Hoverla.

Our cow died, by our, I mean Maria's, the grandma I live with. While I was out hiking in the Carpathians, she, the cow came back home from the pasture and decided to eat 40liters of unprocessed wheat grain. This left no room in her stomach and she swelled up as the grain absorbed water. The town doctor/vet was called, but nothing could be done without surgery. So after Maria's third sleepless night talking to and massaging the cow, they called the butcher and sold the milk cow for meat. They saved some of their investment, but the price for meat is not nearly as high as the price for a working milk cow that was only 9 years old. But the price didn't matter to Maria. For her it was like loosing a limb. She had milked this cow three times a day for 8 years!

During the fight to save the cow, Maria's son's wife disappeared for a few days. This left a house with three kids and no parents, since Maria's son was on one of his transport runs to Poland. This puts a lot of pressure on Maria to run two houses at once, and is forcing Ira, the oldest sister, who I teach in 8^th grade, to grow up faster than a kid should.

I guess I haven't written much about my living situation since I moved in February, but that's because everything has been working out fine. We had turkeys, but we ate them. We have 9 chickens and one rooster. 14 chicks hatched yesterday morning. The house is surrounded by a small yard which despite its limited size has fruit trees, potatoes, tomatoes, beans, peppers, poppies, morning glories, strawberries, onions, garlic, and parsley. Almost every inch has something growing on it. Not only is there a garden around the house, but she has two other fields 5mx10m and 5mX5m which have cucumbers, corn, more potatoes, more beans, carrots, and squash. I helped with some of the farming, particularly turning the soil and breaking dirt clumps, replanting tomatoes and trimming strawberries. I really wish I could help more, but I spend most days in school, and often on the weekend I like to get out of the village on Saturday and then Sunday is not a proper day to work on.

Maria wanted to buy two piglets to fatten over the summer, but never found the black ones she wanted, and thinks it's too late now.